Category: Entry 2 (Page 1 of 2)

After some thinking, I decided that the poetry I would write would be more aimed with a social justice message or a message surrounding some advocacy for change. I figured it best to continue along the course of using it as an expression of some inner conflict regarding something in today’s world that frustrates me. I started by brainstorming a little, trying to think of the thing that bothered me most. This took a little longer than I had anticipated, but narrowing down a long list of grievances takes some time.

The first thing I wanted to express dissatisfaction with is the competitiveness of modern American society. I began to reflect on how we are conditioned from a very early age to compete against each other, and I believe that the modern school system actively encourages this. Not only do I feel like this creates a hostile environment for learning students, I think it seeps into every aspect of our society and makes us less empathetic as people overall. When we focus exclusively on competing with each other, we stop thinking about the feelings of others. While this doesn’t mean everyone you meet and all your friends and you are sociopaths, I think it just makes us more self-oriented as a society when in reality we should be lifting each other up and lending support to those who need it.

When I got writing, I didn’t have too hard of a time articulating this, but being anything less than explicit, even with dumb metaphors, was hard. It made my writing seem self important and pretentious when that was the exact opposite of what I’m trying to convey. In the future I’ll try to focus more on optimism to seem less like a pretentious edgy college teenager.

This is the second round of meditative sketch collaging that I have done for my personal project. I decided to spent a little more time focusing on the meditative aspect of this practice, so I made a playlist of calming music and rented out a quiet study room in the library so I could focus all my energy on my art. Surprisingly, this collage came out much less unified than my last one, which was interconnected with a flow of life energy symbolized by the flowers present in nearly every sketch in the collage.

The disunity in this collage is probably due to my personal conflict with the material that I was analyzing. For this collage session, I set my intention to focus on expressing my interpretation of Kurlansky’s Nonviolence: The History of a Dangerous Idea. I noticed I had a very strong reaction to his depiction of Christianity, especially in its history of being manipulated by state powers and being brokered as political leverage. Many of my sketches show typical symbols of institutionalized power controlling images Christianity or censoring/shaping a faith to fit their agenda. This was difficult for me as I am uncomfortable seeing my religion depicted in this way in Kurlansky’s text, but found a release in expressing this discomfort through art and claiming ownership over my own interpretation of his claims. I genuinely do feel more at peace with the text after this particular session.

During this past week, I    have been practicing a form of Buddhist meditation called Zazen or Zen meditation. Zazen means “seated meditation’ in Japanese. There are two different ways to practice this form of meditation, however both require a seated position (on the ground or a chair), and the back must remain straight. Your gaze is low and focusing on the ground two or three feet in front of you. The form of practice is called Shikantaza, which means ‘just sitting’. When doing this, the meditator does not focus on a specific subject, the goal is to remain in the present moment as much as possible. It consists of being aware of what passes through your mind, without focusing on one specific thought. The second way to practice Zen meditation, which is the form I  practiced, is called focusing on breath. During this exercise, as you breathe in you count one number, starting with ten and counting backwards. When you get to one, start counting over again. If you get distracted or lose count, start over at 10.

This form of meditation was extremely helpful with making me feel more centered and grounded. I    tend to think and worry about the future a lot of the time, and practicing this exercise helped bring me back to the moment and focus on what needs to be done that day. I    had an especially crazy and emotional week, and concentrating on my breath gave me a form of distraction and I    was able to channel my energy into something productive, which lowered feelings of anxiety.

As my first two weeks of vegetarianism comes to an end, I have realized that this lifestyle is not very hard to maintain in the real world, or in a college environment (that is, if you have the means to do so). In learning about the macro-nutritional value of many non-animal products, I’ve been able to create meal combinations that fill me up in the same way that meat would. Getting to a comfortable place in my diet has allowed me to focus more on the ins and outs of the practice of nonviolent eating.

In continuing my research into the world of animal nonviolence, I located an article called Factory Farming: Misery for Animals on the Peta’s website, which touches upon the cruel practices of the meat industry. Many of the practices stated were ones I had never known existed, and frankly, they made me feel nauseous. A few of the unnatural practices of major factory farms include (though are not limited to), the use of antibiotics to speed up growth and keep animals alive in unsanitary conditions, genetic manipulation to aid in further growth and production rates of the animals, and the defeathering/hair removal of animals by means of boiling water, or the hacking and skinning of their bodies, all while conscious. It’s practices like these and the numerous others (storing animals in incredibly confined spaces, etc), that make me not only want to quit meat for good, but also figure out why there are not more vegetarians in the US.

Back in 2014, it was shown that vegetarianism in the US, (for all reasons, including non-violence) included about 2% of all people. This number seemed surprisingly low to me, especially considering the numerous publishings exploiting the ugly side of the meat industry, as well as the increase in mainstream health fads, etc. I found that this percentage (though one of the lowest in the World), was not incredibly far off from most other countries, whose percentages ranged from about 2-11%, according to World Atlas.

In India however, vegetarians take up a whopping 38% of the population, making them the most vegetarian friendly country there is. According to an article in the Huffington Post, there are various reasons for this difference in numbers, one of which includes the major presence of religion in India. The majority of Indian people are of Dharmic faith, meaning they practice one of the four primary Indian religions, (Hinduism, Buddhism, Jainism, and Sikhism), all of which put emphasis on the idea of ahimsa, or nonviolence. Other reasons include the heavy use of agricultural practices in non-coastal Indian areas, (and therefore many vegetable based cuisines), as well as the higher cost of meat vs. vegetable products.

As I continue my personal journey of vegetarianism, my overlapping goal is to figure out some of the root reasons for the incredibly low rates of vegetarianism in the US, and attempt to uncover some possible ways in which we can push to increase the desire for adapting to a vegetarian diet in resistance of nonviolent practices.

I have made some revisions to my personal project since my last entry. Instead of the film focusing on a protagonist grappling with the aftermath of her family member fatally shooting an unarmed civilian while in the line of duty, the film will be about a black protagonist who deals with her younger sister being shot by a black female police officer and uses social media as an outlet after struggling with this violence. The resolution of the plot has the protagonist penning a letter to the police officer and her family. Throughout the film, the protagonist, currently named Amani, will grapple with nonviolence versus violence: how would her sister, currently named Nia, like to be remembered, what would her sister want on the occasion of her death, and how Amani should feel, act, and think about her sister’s death and the greater societal implications of this event. I decided to go this route instead of the previous one because I can only write about what I know, and while I neither have any siblings nor has any of my family members been shot by the police and hopefully never will, I can attest to holding a healthy fear of state/government authorities, especially the police.

While I am not yet at the draft stage of my writing, I am starting to get a feel for my characters, their various personalities, the themes, and the plot. I have also begun to explore in what form I want my film to be expressed, either animation or live action. I can see the advantages and disadvantages of both, and as I delve further into this creative process, I will resolve this. Featured below are pictures detailing the various themes, characters, and plotlines of this short film.                                                                                                                                                             

Since my last personal project entry, I have been more committed to starting a dialogue with both vegetarians and nonvegetarians about eliminating meat from their diet. It is interesting comparing the views of these two groups towards the idea of vegetarianism or veganism. Some of the vegetarians I discussed the issue with were passionate about the lifestyle. Similar to my attitude when I first started my journey, they expressed to me that they thought their dietary options would be limited and ultimately lead them to give up. They revealed that as time went on they began to be more confident in their choice and realized there are many options that allow them to have a fulfilling and balanced diet. Some adapted to a vegetarian diet so well that they challegened themselves even more and became vegans.

During my talk with non vegetarians I noticed that they incorporated meat in most of their meals that they thought it would be virtually impossible to live without it. For example, Fatimah Fair, a student at Lafayette, is passionate about the environment and the well being of animals, however, when asked to consider a vegetarian lifestyle she simply replied with “What am I going to eat? I would faint” Many others share this view that eliminating meat from their diet  would be too drastic of a change. Their dependence on meat overpowers their sympathy for animals. While most agree that the meat industry can be unethical, their lack of action is also influenced by their idea that they are not powerful enough to create change. One of their concerns is giving up meat when other people will continue to consume it and still cause damage.

Considering these viewpoints has lead me to reflect on how I am challenging myself and question if what I am doing is enough. I came to the conclusion that I have become too comfortable with my vegetarian lifestyle and that it is time for me to take the next step. When asking others like Fatimah to take a risk and try something new, I figured it would only be right if I did the same thing so I decided to try out a vegan diet. As stated in The Guide for Nonviolence Practical Action Handbook  by Michael Nagler, to put nonviolence energy to work “ we must have in mind specific goals and must understand how we intend to meet those goals”(28). When deciding to be vegan and convincing people like Fatimah to challenge themselves, I kept this quote in mind to make sure I was setting realistic goals for them and myself. Fatimah, expressed to me that it would be too big of a transition for her completely eliminate meat, so as the first step we agreed that she will eliminate everything else except poultry from her diet.

As I continue with this project, I plan to inform people that they don’t have to dramatically change their diet all at once. The process can be gradual and proportional to their comfort level.

Prior to this personal project I have never created my own mandala, but now that I have I can say that I truly enjoy the practice. As I began to draw my first mandala I struggled with the techniques of mandala making, such as the symmetrical aspect of mandalas. I was not satisfied with my first few attempts to create a mandala, however I think that the practice that I received from those attempts helped me to produce an outcome that I actually liked. For my first mandala I decided that I wanted to stick to using only a pencil and a black pen to create my art, but later in the process I am planning to add colors to my artwork and use different drawing utensils.

So far creating mandalas has been a very relaxing and calming practice and it has given me the opportunity to find time during stressful days to relax and do something that I enjoy.

My hope for my project is to still experiment with the different techniques of mandala making. As of now, I am creating mandalas on a small scale, so that I can focus on the intricacy of each piece that I make. However, I want to create a mandala on a larger scale and devote my time to creating one big mandala. Although I will still focus on the intricacy of the mandala, I think it will be beneficial to make a mandala that takes a lot of time and patience.

Image of my first mandala

Details of my mandala

I decided to take up mandala making as my personal project. I began to draw them often to practice the style of these repeating geometric patterns, however, I wanted to expand my project. I felt that simply drawing different looking mandalas or using different colors was not enough. Instead, I decided to make the mandala more physical and give the item more meaning. Seeing as that Lafayette College is my new home and the biggest change in my life so far, all the items I used in my mandala come from campus. Due to their abundance and the wide variety of shapes and colors, I chose to use flower leaves, stems, and pedals as the matter for my mandala.

What I find notable about this “flower mandala” I created is the diversity within the greater shape. By this, I mean that every item came from a different type of plant. The colors range from white to red to yellow and the textures of some leaves are rough while the pedals are like silk. Furthermore, some of the pedals are ripped or broken. They vary in size and some do not sit perfectly straight up. The beauty is that they can be this way. Its inconsistencies constitute its uniqueness and individuality.

The flower mandala is a reminder of Lafayette College itself and my experiences here. Further, the diversity in the mandala itself is what makes it entirely unique and personal.

Flower Mandala

In the past two months that I have been a vegetarian, I have noticed things that have come as a result of my change in diet. First of all, I am used to being an active person, and I try to go to the gym at least 2-3 times each week. During my first week on campus, while walking back from the gym all the way to Reuf I noticed that I felt really weak and lightheaded. Although it was a warm day out, I realized that this was most likely due to the fact that I was no longer consuming as much protein as I had been previously when I ate meat. Luckily, I was able to adjust my diet and begin making an effort to maximize the amount of protein that I was eating. Combined with this, I started to make myself protein shakes after each time that I went to the gym. I had never previously taken any sorts of protein supplements, however, after doing some light research I now know that it is a good idea to do so if one wishes to work out as a vegetarian.

Another change I which I have noticed is how much more energy I have throughout the day now that I no longer consume meat. This is because plants, fruits, and carbohydrates all are digested in a raid manor to provide your body with quickly usable energy. Meat, however, is much less efficiently broken down by our digestive system and therefore is not as strong of a source of energy in the short-term. This is because humans, although hard to believe nowadays, were not meant to consume meat on a daily or per meal basis. Meat can serve as a valuable source of energy for a much longer period of time because of its slow metabolization, meaning that it is more geared to those who eat every few days or even once a day. Even though I now eat more than I ever did before, because it is all vegetables and carbohydrates, I feel as though my energy levels are higher and I feel that my body is “cleaner” as a result.

My decision to become vegetarian has come as a surprise for much of my family and friends which has helped me initiate conversations about my choice to be vegetarian specifically for moral reasons. Much of the shock stems from being an athlete and people are surprised that an athlete would sacrifice the protein in meat. I have not found it too difficult to get enough protein as I have been eating eggs, peanut butter, tofu, fish, and yogurt, but this shock helps me initiate conversations. One morning I was sitting in the dining hall and I began a conversation with a friend about being vegetarian. His response was how is this helpful? You kill plants when you eat them too. This is technically a logical fallacy because it takes the argument to the extreme. It would be harmful to oneself not to eat anything. By not eating meat, I am protesting the poor conditions in which animals are raised.

Additionally, I discussed conditions that animals are raised in with my mom. We talked about a local slaughterhouse and how a cow escaped the slaughterhouse and found its way to a peace abbey and the peace abbey kept it.

I did have one slip in my diet during family weekend. I went out to dinner with my family during family weekend and I was splitting a meal with my sister and completely forgot that I was eating vegetarian and ended up eating steak. It is not the easiest transition, but when I think about the conditions that animals are often raised in I am convinced to continue.

I look forward to continuing to have conversations with friends and family about vegetarianism. I learn from their point of view just as they can learn from mine.

example of one of my meals, tuna salad and yogurt as proteins.