Going off of Margie, I understand that your project is about the high levels of lead in the Lehigh Valley so adding more clips in specifically about lead would really help bring your story together. The shots that are really working in your favor are the ones of the nature because they help to tell your story. I think I understand what you are trying to do at first by showing the happy people of the Easton community and then making them blurry (maybe this means they were effected by the lead?). I felt as if the shots of the community could be much quicker- maybe a 5 second shot of a happy Easton community and then a black screen and out emerges a different 5 second shot with the community that is blurry and effected by lead. These shots would have benefitted your story more had they been shorted because with a minute long blurry shot of people walking around, your audience might feel as if you accidentally forgot to focus your camera.
Had the chart showing PA’s lead level had not appeared, I am not sure I would have known the story. You have some valuable shots, just add more B-roll solely focused on how to portray lead in the community. I love the ending to your story and how it leads into a hospital room because it adds a feeling of drama that could help force change against the lead problem.