While developing possible ideas and themes for my performative photographs, I kept coming back to being interesting in exploring how social media affects our everyday lives, primarily in social situations. I had begun by shooting people in some of their daily routines, like studying, sitting in class, and getting ready for bed. I would take a photo of them doing these things while using their phones or laptops, something that occurs constantly but is near really thought about. These devices have become another one of our limbs. I then attempted to capture the discomfort once I removed the device from the situation. However, I was not happy with the results as this discomfort was difficult to portray well and I thought the series lacked a performative element.
I moved on with this same concept of devices influencing our lives and began to think how I might show this in a more performative light. I thought of the many times I have reacted so strongly, positively or negatively, to something I saw on my phone or laptop, whether it be a conversation I had over text message or a post I saw on social media. The reactions I have to these things take place over a period of time. This introduced a crucial element of performative photography into my idea.
In my series, I tried to capture the range of emotions that anyone would experience when seeing something they do not want to on social media. So many aspects of our private lives are available for others to see. People tweet about what they are doing at that moment, post pictures of who they are with, and share a multitude of things on sites like Facebook. Having access to these parts of other people’s lives addicts us to social media. Although we know we may not like what we see, we cannot help but explore what other people are doing. What we see can significantly alter our feelings.
When I began shooting with this new idea, I was well aware I did not like to be in front of the camera. However, I could visualize the emotions I wanted to portray, and thought it would be best executed if I had optimal control over it. Since I was not actually seeing something on my phone that I did not want to be, I had to pretend. I soon saw I was not the best actor. I attempted to capture the range of emotions I believe occur when seeing something that would have been better left unseen.
I felt very uncomfortable uploading these to social media. I found it interesting that I was selective about which form of media I ultimately decided to post on. I did not see Snapchat as a practical way. I rarely use my Twitter anymore. I do not often post on Facebook. SO that pretty much left Instagram and Tumblr as platforms to share my images. When considering Instagram, I realized how extremely selective I am about what I post on Instagram. Like the discussions we’ve had in class, people, including myself, truly only do post things they want the world to perceive them as. I think not being thrilled with the final product also contributed to this. I also do not post pictures of myself on Instagram, unless they are with other people, so I felt uncomfortable about this as well. Tumblr was a comfortable alternative since I am relatively anonymous. Although, after posting this sequence, that has changed slightly.